Sunday, July 03, 2011

Yes

The answer is yes. Yes I knew this blog has been sitting here untouched for the past 5 years. (5 years? Oh My God!) Why did I let it sit so long without taking it down? Perhaps there was always this little voice inside me who knew there would be a day when she would want to be heard again.

Yes I am still a complainer (see also whiner, crabby bitch, etc.) I am still wickedly sarcastic, sardonic, and witty. Guess what though? I’m also another 5 years older than the last time we spoke? What has changed in the last 5 years? My answer is both everything and nothing. It was never the subject of this blog but I have had a lifelong addiction. I am a compulsive overeater. I’ve struggled with it my entire life. Since I turned 35 6 months ago I have come to the realization that I, an obsessive compulsive smart and capable woman, no longer have any excuses as to why I do not have this addiction under control. Like most overweight people I have been on the diet roller coaster my entire life. About 10 years ago I vowed never to diet again and have kept that vow except for about a 1 year period which coincided with the actual original writing of this blog where I had a semi-successful attempt at the Atkins diet and took off about 50 lbs which I have spent the last 5 years gaining back.

I’m not going to bore you with all of the details. 35 is a scary age though. It’s time to grow up in a lot of ways. In beginning my new journey I had some things in my favor. While I am extremely overweight I have no other health problems. No co-morbidity issues (diabetes, cholesterol, sleep apnea, etc.) I found this statement I made on this blog over 5 years ago, “I need to stop just going through the motions of my life and dealing with the hand I’ve been dealt. I’m attempting to make it into what I want it to be instead of what’s easiest for me.” Those are some pretty powerful words. They are so much truer today than I could have even imagined when I wrote them so long ago. So here’s what I did. I decided to have Lap-Band surgery. My surgery was Wednesday June 29, 2011. I am 4 days from my surgery today. I am on a liquid diet through Wednesday and as of Wednesday I get to start incorporating other foods into my diet. I feel fine.

I look forward to sharing my new Lap-Band journey and constant sarcasm with you. I look forward to saying Yes to life.

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