Really?

Pre-Op Liquid Diet began 6/26/11

Lap-Band Surgery 6/29/11

As of today I am down 21 lbs.

Looks good on paper but I’m kind of frustrated. I’ve been doing everything they tell me to do. I’m eating my protein first. I’m eating slowly. I’m getting 64+ ounces of water per day. I have exercised every day since Friday 7/8. I started seeing a personal trainer who I have been to twice this week. The scale hasn’t moved in like 10 days. It is soooo aggravating.

Yes

The answer is yes. Yes I knew this blog has been sitting here untouched for the past 5 years. (5 years? Oh My God!) Why did I let it sit so long without taking it down? Perhaps there was always this little voice inside me who knew there would be a day when she would want to be heard again.

Yes I am still a complainer (see also whiner, crabby bitch, etc.) I am still wickedly sarcastic, sardonic, and witty. Guess what though? I’m also another 5 years older than the last time we spoke? What has changed in the last 5 years? My answer is both everything and nothing. It was never the subject of this blog but I have had a lifelong addiction. I am a compulsive overeater. I’ve struggled with it my entire life. Since I turned 35 6 months ago I have come to the realization that I, an obsessive compulsive smart and capable woman, no longer have any excuses as to why I do not have this addiction under control. Like most overweight people I have been on the diet roller coaster my entire life. About 10 years ago I vowed never to diet again and have kept that vow except for about a 1 year period which coincided with the actual original writing of this blog where I had a semi-successful attempt at the Atkins diet and took off about 50 lbs which I have spent the last 5 years gaining back.

I’m not going to bore you with all of the details. 35 is a scary age though. It’s time to grow up in a lot of ways. In beginning my new journey I had some things in my favor. While I am extremely overweight I have no other health problems. No co-morbidity issues (diabetes, cholesterol, sleep apnea, etc.) I found this statement I made on this blog over 5 years ago, “I need to stop just going through the motions of my life and dealing with the hand I’ve been dealt. I’m attempting to make it into what I want it to be instead of what’s easiest for me.” Those are some pretty powerful words. They are so much truer today than I could have even imagined when I wrote them so long ago. So here’s what I did. I decided to have Lap-Band surgery. My surgery was Wednesday June 29, 2011. I am 4 days from my surgery today. I am on a liquid diet through Wednesday and as of Wednesday I get to start incorporating other foods into my diet. I feel fine.

I look forward to sharing my new Lap-Band journey and constant sarcasm with you. I look forward to saying Yes to life.